Friday, November 08, 2013

On Marriage: This is 41 (Los Angeles Wedding)

This is from my post today on The Broke-Ass Bride:

"No one knows the truth of anyone's marriage, not even their own."

- Nora Ephron

Zane and I have been married for almost 11 years, which I guess makes me the marriage expert around here, in a  "A 5th grader is a God to a 3rd grader" sort of way.  Frankly, I'm more comfortable sticking to being a wedding expert.  No one really knows the truth about any marriage, but I can tell you a few things that I've learned.

Marriage is a process that never really ends. You will constantly be trying to find the balance between dealing with what's happening in your lives, and dealing with each other while it is happening. If you think that there is rescue and safety and escape from all harm at the end of that aisle, you are  mistaken. You cannot even imagine what the two of you will go through, together, or separately. For one thing, there is no "separately." Whatever happens to you affects your spouse - your victories and defeats will be theirs, their victories and defeats will be yours. Zane and I got married when we were 30 years old. We lived in an apartment, I had a 9-5 job, and he had his own business.  In the past 10.5 years, both of us have been hospitalized, have seen family members hospitalized, gotten through two miscarriages. Moved three times. I started my wedding planning business, too, which hasn't always been easy on either of us. We've supported friends who've lost parents, and seen other friends die. We've had to have each other's backs through a whole bunch of crap, and it would have been much worse if we'd been alone, or had to go through it with anyone else. There have been a lot bending points, that occasionally looked like they were going to break. And if the past ten years had only been stress and pressure, they would have. Zane and I have grown up together, basically.

Read the rest here.

See you at the end of the aisle, 

Liz Coopersmith
Silver Charm Events
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