Saturday, March 30, 2013

Ask Liz: Wedding Paths of Less Resistance

This week's advice column is UP:

Pro…or Con?
Dear Liz,

I’m waiting for my fiancé’s visa to be approved (he is not a US citizen) so we have a while before making most of our wedding decisions but I am already stressing about my wedding party! I’m the youngest of four and not close with any of my siblings. I’ve been engaged since August and I made sure to call each one of my siblings to tell them the news but was disappointed to get apathetic reactions from all of them. They don’t share many of my beliefs and are very much opposed to the “institution” of marriage.
Because my fiancé does not live in the US only a few of his family members will be able to come. I have several friends who are very important to me and I’d like to honor them by having them as bridesmaids. I am thinking we will have to ask my two brothers to be groomsmen and maybe some other male cousins of mine to have some symmetry in the bridal party.
My question is: do I have to ask my sister to be a bridesmaid? We are very close in age and she has never committed any particularly egregious offense towards me so I know it would seem a bit strange to my family. On the other hand, I recently made a trip to visit her that didn’t go very well and she didn’t ask me anything about my fiancé or our wedding plans. I would rather honor one of my friends who has been particularly supportive than give the place to my sister after years of coldness. How much will I regret it if I don’t include her in my bridal party? Will it be strange to have my brothers involved and not my sister?
Signed,
Disappointed Little Sister

Click here to find out what I told her to do, and what happens when your in-laws pull the "extra guest(s)!" card...
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